Wednesday, December 31, 2008
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Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Merry Christmas to My Readers!

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Thank you to all my Revelant readers. Enjoy the holidays with your loved ones, and safe travels. The news will take a break and return after new year. Unless of course there is something I just have to write about!
Be Well,
Aphra
Monday, December 22, 2008
Last Minute Holiday Gifts and Tales of Hot and Hazardous Potty Business: Relevant Holidays
- I'm biased as a former professional bookseller, but books are fantastic last minute gift ideas for everyone. I can attest that I nearly had to escort people bodily to the doors on Christmas eve to get them to stop scouring for just the book to give. Talk about holiday exhaustion, please, please be nice to a retail store person in the last hours of the holiday crush, and please understand that they to have families and festivities and cakes that they have to frost into the wee hours of the night. So cut 'em a break and leave when you are supposed to. BUT, I digress. Here is a last minute list of great children's books.
- Better yet, avoid the store all together. Not that I am trying to single handedly derail any efforts that are being made to get our economy going (honestly I'd need a few more readers for that one), but there are plenty of ideas hanging around your house, so check these out.
- Want to know what THE hottest toy this season is? Move over Elmo, darling, baby dolls that really, um, poo have flown off of store shelves. They are billed as potty training aides. As if we didn't have enough real poo to handle in our daily lives, we have to endure the doll's to? Yeeeeech!
- And still on the bathroom/potty training subject, this one is a little odd, but helpful due to all the traveling to unfamiliar places. Apparently little penises are prone to lots of toilet slamming injuries while visiting non kid proofed destinations, so be vigilant!
And, for all those parents that are really just not that into this whole hullabaloo--Religion, holidays, et al. (sorry, I am, but I recognize the differences around me, so consider this a little gift non-holiday affiliated), there are others in the so-called "humanist parenting movement," who feel your pain.
Whatever you celebrate have a happy and healthy time!
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Sunday, December 21, 2008
Working and Stay At Home Parents Are Actually On the Same Side: Relevant READ THIS
If you wanted to design an ideal childcare strategy, you wouldn't start
from here. You'd have to go much further back, to gender parity and social
equality, and an economy that was designed to serve those ideals, not ride
roughshod over them.
Perhaps the recession will induce a rethink; perhaps technology will
offer more civilised, financially manageable ways of working to more people. But
it's hard to see the balance of work and family being much easier for the next
generation of parents. Not as long as we are prepared to countenance quite so
much inequality, anyway.
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Saturday, December 20, 2008
Layoff the Gloom, Taxing Anxiety and Give Credit for A Well Laid Plan: Relevant Fiscal Functioning

Fiscal concerns have you down?
- Hold on to any scrap of good news campers, Wells Fargo's economists see the recession ending in late 2009.
- In denial that tax season is just around the corner? Well, get proactive people and check out the tips in this article as well as this article that give you useful things you should be doing right now to manage your taxes.
- Finally some common sense reforms are coming to credit cards, although implementation is still a way off. Many of the predatory policies of many credit issuers that leads all to often to ruin are being addressed.
- Affected by a lay-off, or know someone who is? Check out an AP article that gives good, actionable tips for handling a lay-off, as well as an article from HR Guru that addresses finding a new job under these circumstances.
- And speaking of clinging to the good news, there appears to be somewhat of a silver lining in this mess: people and families are growing closer.
Crisis has a way of focusing one's priorities and what one's values doesn't it? Kind of makes one wonder if there is indeed a plan in there somewhere, doesn't it?
Photo courtesy of http://spacespin.org/
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Friday, December 19, 2008
Rant Break: Relevant Retail Recoil
I'm a notorious procrastinator when it comes to things I really hate doing...like shopping...in crowds...while doing mental budgeting gymnastics. Waiting in lines is high on my avoid at all costs list as well, and salespeople who mess up gift receipts also are the target of my holiday exasperation. Before you get all indignant on their behalf, let me remind you I WAS one of those folks once upon a time, and I know when someone is just phoning it in. I understand it, I just don't endorse it. Why don't I shop online? Besides a strange aversion to frequently meeting the UPS/FED Ex driver in my jammies on a regular basis, as I said, I procrastinate, which then leads to increased shipping charges, which leads me back to...mental budgeting gymnastics.
So it is this negative cycle of retail avoidance that landed me in the girls section of JC Penney's today looking for cute outfits for my niece (Yes, you can find cute outfits at JC Penney, I had to work at it, but it can be done, and no this is most definitely not a paid post-I don't do them). The budgeting issue was happily in check, as it seems just about everything was $7.99 in the department. Check, the economy sucks, as evidenced by the blaring sale signage verging on liquidation levels. I realized then that it is occasionally good to get out to get my sociological news; Internet news postings can be so "clinical."
Other than an economy in decline, here also staring me in the face was the evidence of a parenting culture out of whack. Tucked in amongst the plethora of Hannah Montana and High School Musical trademarked everything, were bedazzled, sparkly t-shirt after t-shirt bearing messages such as "It's all about Me, Myself and I," "Spoiled Rotten," "Because I Said So," and some vaguely disturbing "Daddy" messages that sealed the deal, and caused a full scale feminist recoil. Seriously? People send their daughters out in this stuff? This extremely glaring and narcissistic messaging is considered hip?
Listen, I'm not a cultural reactionary, hairy-legged feminist, whatever pejorative moniker you would like to assign to me, but I can't help but think that THIS is a part of the problem of why women have such an issue getting ahead. And why do we wonder where we went wrong in raising generations of kids that are largely defined and motivated by what they want alone, who get indignant when an employer doesn't quite see that their view of things is worthy of constant praise, and a hefty raise on their second day? We are quite literally setting these girls up for failure and disappointment, because when they encounter "the real world" they are in for a jarring world view readjustment. Or they just marry a sugar daddy and star in the Housewives of... And while I'm at it, why do we wonder where our politics of "exceptionalism" comes from, when we put "exceptional" billboards on our kids, and raise them with this mindset? Where does the line lie between harmless cute snarkiness with sequins and glitter, and crass commercial cashing in on the erosion of our daughters and society?
I'm just saying...that's the beauty of a blog, it's all about me.
The news will return shortly.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Change is Coming to Education, and None to Soon: Relevant Matriculation

Bringing you up to date on recent education headlines:
- President elect Obama has just announced his selection of Chicago superintendent of schools, Arne Duncan, for Secretary of Education. His selection is viewed as a good choice to balance the calls of opposing forces in the education debate, having established a track record of tough school standards, as well as a productive and respectful relationship with the powerful teachers' unions.
- Part of Obama's education agenda includes a strategic $10 billion investment in early childhood education. "Mr. Obama’s platform, which Mr. Duncan helped write, emphasizes extending care to infants and toddlers as well, and it makes helping poor children a priority. It would also provide new federal financing for states rolling out programs to serve young children of all incomes."
- As public schools continue to struggle, and the rates of homeschool instruction increase, some look to the charter school program as a model that may address the inadequacies of the system. Washington D.C.'s charter school program is steadily making gains and maybe a model that the administration and legislators will take a close look at when considering overhauls to the system. The article is long, but well worth reading through for the nuts and bolts of a system that has changed education on a larger scale and looks to be bearing fruit.
- The quality of teachers has always been a hot button issue in the education debate. And the process and requirements for certification are a particularly thorny issue. Keeping the labor pool restricted, with more cumbersome requirements for entry benefits the unions that need to keep supply and demand in check to maintain their bargaining leverage. But this is not always in the best interest of the children, especially in areas that are not a desirable to teach in. In areas of the country that have instituted alternative pathways to teaching, metrics have indicated improved performance, and some feel merits real consideration in prospective solutions for education.
- Meanwhile others are finding alternative modes of learning delivery...YouTube. Math and science are particularly hot views, and the "YouTube tutorial on calculus integrals has been watched almost 50,000 times in the past year. Others on angular velocity and harmonic motion have gotten more than 10,000 views each."
- Speaking of math, the news isn't all bad. We've actually improved, although the results are still mixed, and the improvements have some in the lowest 10th percentile. Some systems have made the improvements by focusing on the basics:
Minnesota is perhaps the best example of what can happen when a state narrows
the number of topics taught at a given grade level to allow teachers to
concentrate on fundamental concepts. Since 1995, its fourth-graders made gains
three times the size of the overall US gains in math. The state's eighth-graders
outperformed their US peers as well. Minnesota is now "on the edge of
world-class performance," says William Schmidt, a professor at Michigan State
University who has studied international math curriculum. "Everybody always
wants to know, is it possible we could ever perform like those top-achieving
countries? And I think the answer is, yes we can," Professor Schmidt says.
- Some modes of alternative teaching, however, are not as well received. A teacher in White Plains, NY, offended several students and parents when teaching a lesson on slavery, when the teacher bound two black students hands and feet to illustrate points of the lesson.
- In other news, the Newberry Medal award is traditionally awarded for excellence in young reader writing, a long a go-to list for teachers and parents seeking quality reading materials for their children that will encourage a love of reading for a lifetime. But some are leveling the criticism recently that the award is losing touch with what children actually like to read.
Photo courtesy of Oregon.gov
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Family Role Models with Actual Values: Relevant Parenting
It's one of those "breathe of fresh air" elements of the new President-elect and his family, that people are now starting to take some cues from the soon to be First Family, and reevaluating things like chores and allowances. If it's good enough for the Obama girls, maybe it's good for my family as well! And perhaps most inspiring is the fact that parents are using Barack Obama as a real role model that they can point to, and they are telling their young children that smart, straight-playing individuals can in fact make it to the top.
Hopefully these particular role models will be a more compelling example that we as a culture can "roll with."
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Sunday, December 14, 2008
Sticks and Stones may Break my Bones, but Pins will Offend my Dignity: Relevant Random Fun

Random Fun Stuff:
- A few days ago I wrote about NORAD's annual tracking of Santa Claus. Ever wonder how a major defense institution got into the business of tracking Santa? Turns out it was a wrong phone number printed in a newspaper in the mid 1950s that kicked off the annual tradition.
- Some of our traditions around Christmas might seem a little odd to the uninitiated, like the American proclivity to dunk poultry in a potentially combustible vat of oil. We'll deep fry just about anything. But Europeans are not to be outdone in the odd tradition department. In Catalonia the holidays are particularly applicable to mothers of potty training toddlers, and centers around...poo. I'm not kidding.
- A guilty pleasure is watching video clips on the Internet, and a list in the Washington Post of "The Ten Silliest Videos We Wasted Time Watching This Year" is great for a quick funny fix. My friend tells me that I may have found her son's future wife in the Star Wars According to a Three Year Old clip.
- Manicurists may soon institute a ban on the i-Phone, as it is not very user friendly to women with long nails.
- Do you know if you are late to work in NYC due to subway delays, they will write an excuse note for you?
- In Australia, according to Reuters, "Teachers using red pen to mark students' work could be harming their psyche as the color is too aggressive, according to education strategies drafted by an Australian state government." I must have mangled my fellow yearbook staff in high school, where I was known as "Miss Red Pen, Editor in Chief."
- Not so fun, more than it is absurd. People are now testing their children for specific sports genes. The plan is to direct them towards sports they will be more naturally inclined to.
- Chuck E Cheese's is a rough scene in many communities throughout the country. One police officer remarked,"There's a biker bar down the street, and we rarely get calls there." The "place where a kid can be a kid," turns out to be more "the place where adults can be a jack..."
- The headline on the Broadsheet blog on Salon.com was a bit deceptive, "Bush is Back." Lo and behold when I read it, the "bush" was suffice it to say nothing to do with George W. Apparently the economy inspires cost cutting measures in every area.
- Perhaps we Americans could be a tad more respectful of our national leaders, but it takes a thick skin to direct the free world. France's Nikolas Sarkozy doesn't seem to have this tolerance, and recently moved for removal of a voodoo doll likeness of himself being sold in France. The courts ruled that "voodoo dolls can still be sold by a publisher as long as they come with a warning that sticking pins in the toy is an affront to his dignity." Ever heard of the adage, he can dish it out, but can he take it? Apparently, non.
Photo courtesy of http://soisawonthesubwaytoday.blogspot.com/
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Saturday, December 13, 2008
Getting a Presidential Life: Relevant Politics and Family

- You thought your PTA was rough? Try the Sidwell school PTA, where your fellow parents are political friends and foes alike. How do you handle friendship crisises, when the friend happens to be the child of a major political correspondent, key Senate vote, or even granddaughter of your VP?
- Most wives and moms get advice from other women about how to adapt to the new neighborhood, or set of work colleagues, but in Michelle Obama's case, she gets to hear from Cherie Blair, wife of former British Prime Minister, Tony Blair, as well as her husband's future Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton. Not to mention that all media new and traditional scrutinizes your every move and its meaning for the status of women in the country.
- It's not everyday that one willingly invites one's Mother-in-Law to move in with you. And she even gets a secret service name. That could get sticky.
- Selecting a dog gets very complicated.
- The landlord has strict guidelines about what you can and cannot do to your house.
- Your parenting also gets scrutinized, such as weather your kids will do chores. And there are actual books about the subject of what it will be like for your kid growing up in this particular house.
- You play the starring role in the Mommy Wars. While you work to set the standard of balanced family life as "Mom-In-Chief", the women on your husband's team, and other professionally accomplished women, resent the fact that they are expected to have "no life." Some say that it is just the way it is, so get over it, get to the top, and change it when you are there, and they kind of look down on you for deciding to shelve your career to be the First Mom. E tu sista?
It will certainly be an interesting four to eight years for family Obama, and us as well. Something tells me that Michelle Obama will have one interesting letter to add to the Mother Letter Project when this is all done, because she is just like all of us, but yet not. She'll definitely need some humor about the struggle to balance, so she might want to check out the motherhood balance lessons to be learned from the Wii, originally posted on MommyTrak'd. And you should to, it will make you chuckle.
For me, all is interesting in politics and family life and I look forward to the next several years!
Photo courtesy of www.obamamagazine.com/
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Storied Children: Relevant Reading

Having books at home, and reading to your children is so important. As a college student I worked on a graduate student's project involving early childhood literacy. As a volunteer family tutor I would visit the homes of families being studied for the project. I saw something that seemed so fundamentally alien to me--homes with no books.
Reading the Books on the Nightstand blog, I was reminded that snazzy toys are nice to have, but for my family, books are essential. What about for you? As the writer asks in the mentioned post, "how are you raising a reader?"
As budgets are tight, the library has once again become an important resource to keep a fresh mix of books for my growing toddler to be exposed to, but there is also a "Netfix for children's books," excitebooks.com. This service also has a very interesting and inspiring twist. Instead of the books being returned to circulation, they are instead donated to a local school in need. You can express your love for reading and support local schools.
Finally, I read quite a good interview in Der Spiegel with Cornelia Funke, sometimes referred to as the "German J.K. Rowling." A movie adaptation of her book, Inkheart, is just about to hit theaters. A few of her interesting perspectives:
"It doesn't matter whether a child reads a book, listens to an audio book
or watches a movie. It's only important that children grow up with
stories.""But we mustn't worship books as deeply sacred shrines, and declare
everything else to be a fall from grace. The problem with many books for
children and adolescents is that they try to send a message. But a child will
not voluntarily pick up a book hostile to fun and, therefore, will learn nothing
about language. And that child is right to do so. We don't go into a bookstore
and say: Give me an especially difficult and instructive book."
How do you keep stories alive in your children's lives?
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Save Handmade Toys!: Relevant Action Needed
An example of when good intentions go horribly awry. In an effort to make sure that toys are safe, a whole host of regulations covering testing requirements and labeling are currently awaiting implementation this coming February by the Consumer Product Safety Commission. Problem is that the regulations will be catastrophic for small boutique businesses, and also make European made toys further out of reach due to specific requirements above and beyond their already stringent restrictions compared to the current U.S. regulations.
Lend your mom voice to urge them to reevaluate key provisions of this legislation that takes effect in February to protect small business people and the artisinal toy market by visiting the action page created on Cool Mom Picks. It is easy, and so very needed.
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Friday, December 12, 2008
Is it Ethical to Dispose of Unused Frozen Embryos Or Ticket a Laboring Woman on the Way to The Hospital?: Relevant Pregnancy and Birth

- The journey of infertility is filled with difficult decisions, not the least of which in the case of IVF treatment is what to do with frozen embryos once the couple is either done having children, or decides to cease the procedure. Complicating this is the fact that there aren't always satisfactory choices available to couples. Hopeful parents aren't always alerted sufficiently up front that they will potentially encounter these kinds of ethical, moral, and spiritual dilemmas. Nor are they throughout the process, as goals, situations and attitudes may change. With increased attention to this dimension perhaps couples would more carefully consider how many embryos they create at the outset.
- For those couples that require an egg donor, another risk they don't anticipate is when a donor drops out, causing a lot of grief, stress, and lost money. In Illinois three egg donor agencies are coordinating to guarantee that a couple has access to another agency's resources when their donor back out. Ten percent of donors typically drop out, but these days the supplies are increasing. The Chicago Tribune notes that there has been "a 30 percent increase in young women expressing interest in becoming donors, prompted by the bad economy."
- When it comes to surrogacy, a recent article published in the weekend New York Times magazine, recounting a wealthy woman's first person experience of going through the surrogacy process has drawn fire and particularly sharp criticism. The critic is not swayed by the emotional nature of the process, but rather questioning of the exploitative relationship between often well to do parents, and surrogates who live in decidedly more modest circumstances.
- Medical science and the resiliency of the human body is often truly inspiring. A successful birth recently resulted from transplanted ovaries from one sister to another.
- This may be a very promising development reported by Reuters: "Doctors may soon be able to diagnose inherited diseases such as cystic fibrosis, thalassaemia and sickle cell anemia in fetuses by simply testing a blood sample taken from the mother."
- Turns out meddling mothers have a genetic reason for wanting their daughters to marry and doctor or a lawyer. A new report reveals that smart men have higher quality sperm. But don't panic! The lead researcher was quoted as saying, "This is scientifically interesting, but unimportant in terms of people's likelihood of conception or fertility." Tell that to your mother.
- When you are pregnant, or trying to get pregnant, it suddenly seems like the rest of the world around you is pregnant. In one town which draws most of its population from military families, most of the rest of the women really are. The return of the division from a long deployment sparked a baby boom, and people struggle to get supplies and prenatal care. Additionally, many are choosing to start or add to their families to take advantage of extra leave before returning to overseas duty.
- For all the wonder of the human body, pregnancy and childbirth still carry risks. A recent report found that mothers-to-be collectively are more daring and willing to take those risks than their doctors. But we have our limits as the reporter notes, especially when it comes to the lingering affects on our, shall we say, private considerations. Believe them when they say "kegels."
- I can't explain why, but every since I read this story a while back I have been trying to recall a movie, in fact a musical ,that forcefully asserts in relation to women or children that they have "got to be taught." News flash, it's riskier and riskier to have children later in life. Yet, we persist, and health care professionals insist that women must be better educated about the risks. More so right now because in tough economic times, many couples are thinking very strongly about delaying starting or adding to their families. Try telling this to the seventy year old Indian woman who just gave birth, after fifty plus years of marriage.
- And finally, we have all seen those dramatic, and usually funny, mad-capped dashes to the hospital by freaked out laboring couples. Many parents to be secretly fear just this scenario. Usually they are escorted, or otherwise hilariously assisted, by the law enforcement they encounter along the way, and they safely arrive at the hospital just in time. A couple wasn't quite so lucky, who despite being in obvious labor, received a citation from a diligent patrolmen who ticketed them for driving illegally in a prohibited lane during heavy rush hour traffic, AND made them wait while he finished ticketing another car.
Photo Courtesy of http://health.howstuffworks.com/
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Thursday, December 11, 2008
Greening the Holidays and Saving Some Time and Money: Relevant Holiday Preparation
- If you haven't already gotten your tree, check out this article that talks about healthy Christmas trees and ornaments from Debra's List forums, the must view resource on the web for reducing chemical exposure in your home and personal products in my opinion.
- Save money and the planet with alternatives in giftwrapping brought by Asha Dornfest of ParentHacks. I'm a rampant recycler myself, so much so that a small joke in the family is that if you really like the giftbag you just gave me, it will probably be coming back to you in the future.
- Toy store fatigue? Wondering if the toy your kid is pleading for is toxic? Another safety resource to use, especially during the surge in toy influx to the household, as well as add to your bookmarks is The Good Guide's Guide to Safe Toys.
- Eco and budget friendly holiday greeting card resources: http://www.postcards.org/ , http://www.123greetings.com/ , http://www.all-yours.net/
Happy Holidays!
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Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Tracking Santa Claus: Relevant Junior News Junkies
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Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Their Wounds are Our Wounds: Relevant World News
Pardon me, but I'm going to step up on my soapbox now:I'm aware that I don't write the typical "mommy blog," and I'm fine with that. Fact is that I'm just not all that into adding yet another virtual chapter to the saga of losing the baby weight, sex after baby, taming toddlers with 'tude, and finding a pair of jeans that addresses (insert hated body part post-baby here). It's been covered, ALOT, and by people way more talented and pleasurable to read than I.
And, I'm not saying that people who do write and read about that are lacking. I'm strangely drawn to the tales of Angelina and Brad, et al. as well. And Lord knows I'll sign up for a pair of jeans that can a.) tame the donut, b.) lift the bum, and c.) not bring to mind visions of Joe the Plumber when I bend down for the hundredth time to retrieve my kid from whatever mess-in-the-making he is hell bent on plunging himself into. Just like any other mother, I also discuss all the minutiae of motherhood with my girlfriends, trying to figure out how to get my kid to eat vegetables and not put his buddies in a head lock at playgroup. I write about it to, just browse my archive here. I'm not smarter, I'm not a saint, I don't have all the answers.
It's just that when I became a mother, instead of the world getting smaller, it got bigger, a whole lot bigger. For me it is the gift and the challenge of this new chapter in my life. I have brought a life to this planet, and although I was always fairly informed about what was happening beyond our borders, it was just not something that touched a nerve regularly and with, well, relevance.
So for me when I read the back and forth about Michelle Obama and weather she is selling herself short to just be "Mom in Chief," I don't fret about what her choices say about mine, or their implications for women. What I think is that she understands that motherhood is a powerful platform for womanhood. The mother has a covenant to keep for herself and her world when she first felt that flutter in her belly. Lifting this up rather than tearing it down ought to be the covenant we keep with fellow women. Motherhood doesn't define a woman, but it does dramatically alter her landscape.
And that landscape ought to include the rest of the world. The other covenant we should keep is not to turn away from other women and mothers in the world, and herein lies a driving passion of this mommy blogger. Countless reports have affirmed the basic principle that when women are educated and empowered in a society, things get better. Somehow, those who want to control others for negative ends understand this, and they are merciless to women in their sphere.
So I write about things you won't always read on other mommy blogs. They don't get high clicks, but they are a calling from which I can't turn away. Motherhood is a bridge between cultures, and something tells me this First Lady to be, like countless before her gets that.
You can't solve the world's problems, but you can do your part to not turn away, and to teach your children well. As women and mothers in a blessed position to be able to speak, we have a responsibility to make sure their stories are told, and their suffering not suppressed.
By all means, be interested in the strange mysteries of teething and potty training, be outraged if you wish about Motrin marginalizing babywearers, but please don't look away from these stories as well:
- The International Criminal Court is considering a key ruling as to weather systematic rape, such as that planned and executed by President Omar Hassan al-Bashir of Sudan against three ethnic groups, constitutes genocide. As David Scheffer writes in the International Herald Tribune, "Hanging in the balance is whether the heinous strategy of mass rape in modern warfare will be condemned and prosecuted for what it truly is: genocide." He quotes one observer as saying, "'In this society if you rape one woman, you have raped the entire tribe.'"
- Female leaders in Afghanistan face increasing security threats from the ousted Taliban, and yet they persist in speaking, as long as their faces and names are not printed. The risks are grave, certain death or maiming and threats to their families. But as one leader was quoted as saying in an AP report, "'My philosophy is that you are born, and one day you will be dying. So why not die while being an ideal for others?'"
- Democratic nation building is a tricky thing, more so especially when doing so in a society that does not share key common cultural norms. In Iraq, while empowering tribal and religious leaders has been a strategic move that has netted some degree of increased security to strengthen the fragile freedom of Iraqis, women aren't faring as well. While violence abates somewhat, tribal killings of women is increasing. The newly empowered leaders are imposing brutally interpreted codes of Islam that among others things disallows educating women and sanctions "honor killings."
- Meanwhile, Islamic feminists struggle to reclaim what they say are the sources of their religion that do not sanction this brutality and repression of women.
- Perhaps one of the most tragic consequences of the attack on Mumbai is its legacy for the children. Much as our 9/11 did, Mumbai's horrific attack leaves deep and resonate wounds on the children for which all mothers cry.
- In Zimbabwe, a terrible situation of hunger, has gotten unimaginably worse as Cholera grips the land. The tragic consequences of a leader allowed to run amok.
- The death of a fifteen year old at the hands of police has sparked riots in Greece unlike any seen for decades. Gripped by difficult financial straits and sensational political corruption, the threads of society are unraveling alarmingly.
This list is not meant to paralyze with despair, but to inspire with a shared burden, and a passion to remain alert to the sufferings of this world, while working to change your little corner of it, one well loved and secure child, supported fellow woman and mother, responsible and accountable government, and blog post at a time.
Now this mommy shall step off her pedestal and seek her bed. Lack of sleep is a pressing issue for mothers I hear.
Photo Courtesy of http://www.stolenchildhood.net/
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Monday, December 8, 2008
Take this Job and Keep It!: Relevant Weathering the Storm

- There are a wealth of articles that advise what to do when you are laid off, or to avoid it, but two articles really stood out for me. The first by Gladys Edmunds is unique in that she reminds people who have been laid off, or fear it, that they, "have the skills to regroup and reorganize." Further she makes the very proactive assertion, "When you approach your work with an entrepreneurial spirit, you will recognize that you own the skills you were hired for. You take those assets and continue to use them for your benefit wherever you work. " This is very inspiring for so many that feel they do not have some say in what happens to them. So take heart, and take those skills into your next company or venture.
- And, in an effort to avoid being laid off in the first place, or at least be in the best shape literally and figuratively to weather it, follow the advice of business leader, Kevin Merritt, who isolates the ten things you need to do before you are laid off. It's practical and realistic, so get to it!
- If there is a bright spot in these difficult times, it is that it forces us to reassess our priorities and our values, and as one writer in the Christian Science Monitor wrote recently start at one critical solution, "Expect less and want less."
- You may be stressed, and short on time, so check out a bookmark worthy article in the Washington Post recently had a great list of top financial sites by category to seek out for help.
- Already starting to dread tax season? Check out this article that advises some savvy tax pre-planning steps that can save you money.
- On the fence about the automakers bailout? Consider the issue from the perspective of the ramifications of bankruptcy.
- Columnist Michelle Singletary has set your financial reading list for the coming year, unique paced to her predictions for how the economic conditions will play out over the coming twelve months.
- Finally, many many marriages go through really tough times during times such as these, which may have them considering divorce. Before you go there, read this article about the financial implications and cost of divorce. It's a strange blessing, but it just may make you reconsider and work it out. And as parents, it is o.k. to be honest with your kids, and check out the tips in this AP article.
All in all, remember, "this to shall pass." Surround yourself with a positive and supportive network of people, which a recent report is a key driver of individual happiness.
And if all else fails, take a moment to laugh and enjoy the ten silliest videos to watch on the Internet, compiled by the Washington Post.
Photo Courtesy of http://workplacewellnessgb.com/workplacestress.aspx
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All Top is Awesome: Relevant Usefulness
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Sunday, December 7, 2008
The HMN Green Mamas Team To The Rescue!:Relevant Holistic Living

Building upon yesterday's post about holiday angst over giving, I have a fabulous list of resources for those that are looking for a one stop shop of wonderful holiday giving suggestions from my friends at The Holistic Moms Network. Their "Green Mama Team" has compiled "The Great Green Gift-Giving Guide," which they have graciously allowed me to reprint here for your benefit.
I joined my local chapter of the Holistic Moms when my son was just a few months old, and with a vague inclination to want to learn about healthy ways to care for my family. I had a lot of questions that just weren't being addressed in my early mommy peer groups, and I sought a community that valued questions and informed parenthood. I'm happy to say the membership is a robust and diverse group that will both challenge and support mothers wherever they are in their journey. If you are interested in having access to resources such as what follows and a supportive community, join here.
And now for the good stuff, and hope the tips are useful for you.
Gifts of Time:
Rather than more “stuff,” offer a certificate of your making (get creative!) for your time or a life experience or service. This can work great for adults and children alike; friends, family members, or even acquaintances. Conserves a lot of waste, transportation, packaging, and materials while being quite thoughtful!
Just a few ideas: a homemade organic meal (or meal of the month, or dinner out), chores done for you, a special trip or outing together (to a pottery studio, a spa treatment, a museum, beach, or winery), lessons for something you are an “expert” at (guitar, knitting, cooking). Your imagination is the limit!
- Need more help? Try these:
- http://www.excitations.com/
- http://www.xperiencedays.com/
- http://www.giftybox.com/index.php
Gifts That Give Back:
There are thousands of ways to give small but meaningful donations in someone's name, supporting just about any cause you can think of. Make your recipient feel good, make yourself feel good, help the world a bit, and save waste and packaging!
Some ideas:
Plant trees, provide clean safe water in developing nations, give aid and sustainable development in war-torn or disaster areas, adopt an endangered or threatened animal (manatees,world wildlife, elephants), aid for African HIV orphans, help struggling communities end hunger and poverty, buy carbon offsets.
- Can't decide? Give a charity gift card!
- Need more help? Try these:
- http://www.charitynavigator.org/
- “Gifts That Keep On Giving” http://www.thegreenguide.com/doc/111/charity
- “Better, Greener Gifts” http://www.greenlivingtips.com/articles/262/1/Better-greener-gifts.html
Gifts That You Make:
You don't have to have loads of artistic talent, money, or time to make wonderful, thoughtful handmade gifts. Finding the right idea is the hard part, but there is one out there for every person on your list. Try to recycle items and materials you already have and/or use sustainable materials to craft your gifts.
- A few new suggestions: Create a set of spice mixes or personalized flavored coffees, put together a family photo album, make your own cookbook of favorite recipes, research and make your own family tree, a set of homemade art supplies like finger paint and clay, a chalkboard placemat.
- Need more help? Try these:
- “A Homemade Christmas” http://familyfun.go.com/arts-and-crafts/season/specialfeature/holiday_gifts_ms/
- “Handmade Gifts” http://www.marthastewart.com/photogallery/handmade-gifts?lnc=6259e0917df4d110VgnVCM1000003d370a0aRCRD&rsc=lpg_col2_holiday&lpgview=thumb&showComments=true
- “101 Handmade Gift Ideas” http://100handmadegifts.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2006-11-13T18%3A39%3A00-07%3A00&max-results=50
- “Unique Handmade Gift Ideas”http://www.uniqueholidaygiftideas.com/handmade-gift-ideas.html
Gifts That Teach:
Why not spread some environmental knowledge with your holiday cheer? This can especially be a great choice for kids as there are many fun eco-friendly games, books, and toys.
- Some good choices: A paper recycling kit, a build-your-own solar car kit , kits that teach about aspects of nature like bugs or growing plants, any number of fabulous eco-friendly kid's books or adult tomes (see our previous tip here or search online here).
- Need more help? Try these:
- http://www.thinkbutton.com/
- “Gifts That Teach This Christmas” http://www.suite101.com/blog/sbhyde/gifts_that_teach_this_christmas
- https://www.reachandteach.com/store/index.php?l=product_list&c=15
Gifts Someone Else Makes:
Not feeling crafty or short on time? Support sustainable development, local artisans, and free trade with your purchases. Look as much as possible for items made from natural/recycled/sustainable materials, and as with food - the more local, the better, to reduce the carbon footprint of your gifts.
- Some suggestions:
Organic fabric products, toys made of sustainably-harvested wood, rubberwood, or bamboo, reusable bags (make your own or check out some of the great options at http://www.reusablebags.com/), solar-powered gadgets, locally handmade jewelry or other little treasures. - Need more help? Try these:
- “Inexpensive, Creative and Eco-Friendly Gift Ideas” http://www.newdream.org/holiday/giftideastaff.php
- http://www.pristineplanet.com/
- “Green Kids Holiday Gift Guide” http://ecochildsplay.com/2007/11/19/green-kids-holiday-gift-guide/
- “Green Gifts from TDG's Holiday Gift Guide” http://www.thedailygreen.com/living-green/green-gifts
- “Everything You Need For Happy Green Holidays” http://www.thedailygreen.com/green-homes/latest/green-christmas-holidays-2007-451120
- http://www.mothering.com/sections/shopping_guide/shopping_guide.html#toys
Compiled by HMN Green Mamas Team, November 2008
Sources:
“Environmentally Friendly Gifts” “Green Christmas Ideas” “20+ Ways To Give Without Giving 'Stuff'”
Logo reprinted courtesy of Holistic Moms Network with my thanks, all rights reserved.
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Saturday, December 6, 2008
No Virginia, There Isn't a Santa Claus: Relevant Parenting Holiday Angst

Guilty parents are crying "uncle," and imploring marketers to lay off the heavy marketing of toys directly to their children this year that they are simply unable to afford. It is also suggested that the reprehensible behavior that spawned sensational headlines and tragic outcomes in this year's Black Friday crush, were in part caused and intensified by these feelings of guilt, disappointment and a desire to provide these material comforts amidst difficult circumstances. In sum, snagging that doorbuster prize became a do or die proposition, literally.
While not all feel such desperation to satisfy their children's holiday wish list, many mothers are volunteering that they are at least foregoing presents for themselves in order to be able to provide for their children. This is troubling news for retailers, since the women's sector of the holiday shopping season is significant.
Also, in uncertain times parents are mining their own childhood for comforting, and somehow more simplistic pleasure. The nostalgic toy market is hot this year. Ken Moe of BacktoBasicsToys.com says, "It's instinctive in tough times to reach back to a happier, simpler time," he said. "Parents remember how much they loved those toys, and want that same happiness for their children."
Some parents are starting to think outside the box as well, and take advantage of rental services, such as RentaToy.com that cut the cost of toy commitment, and allow parents to cycle high quality toys through the household, and return once the child has tired or outgrown it. What they do buy has to be highly value added, well reviewed, and multi-task, such as games that teach one how to cook.
Many parents worry about excessive materialism, security while shopping, and basic toy safety considerations, since new toy safety standards do not apply to the current crop of toys on the shelves, but take effect early next year. Therefore, many of these parents are shopping online and searching for deals, as well as scrutinizing what they do buy on sites such as HealthyToys.org to check their safety, and buying less and higher quality selections. Or, they are returning to hand making their gifts. These parents are expressing a desire to dovetail their environmental priorities, with their desire to achieve a commercial free holiday.
Yet others are hardly shopping at all, turning to more spiritual and community based activities such as gifts to those in need, or works of service, and involving their children, to underscore a less material basis for the holidays. They are also picking up classic Christmas stories to offer "messages of hope, faith and togetherness during an intensely uncertain year," according to William J. Palmer, an English professor and Charles Dickens expert. But don't look to the Disney versions, says a Catholic clergy in the U.K., who has cautioned his parishioners to the evils of Disney, which he claims, "pretends to provide stories with a moral message, but has actually helped to create a more materialistic culture."
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But Mom The Lucky Charms is "Fortified": Relevant Health

- Remain informed about what is in the food you eat and feed to your children. Sure it says "fortified," "high-fiber," "whole-grain," etc., but beware the "health halo," a marketing strategy that misleads parents into thinking that they are indeed feeding their kids in a healthful way. And beware salt; there is a whole lot more salt than you think in common foods. People who have allergen issues also have to remain vigilant, because things slip through the cracks, even at the beloved Whole Foods.
- My husband uses a aerosol deodorant that I despise. When he uses it, I force him to go to another bathroom because it bothers my breathing. Did you know that overuse of such a product in a not well ventilated space can actually cause death? A twelve year old in the U.K. recently died from a "deodorant overdose." Make sure your blooming stinky pre-teens and teens know to employ moderation and keep the area well ventilated.
- INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT: do not, I repeat DO NOT dilute formula. It may be tempting to families struggling to contain their costs, but it can be fatal. Please take the time to check out this alert from Inside Edition.
- On the subject of formula, safe handling of formula is critical. If improperly stored it can cause a fatal illness, enterobacter sakazakii illness, a rare disease of the blood and nervous system. It recently killed two children in New Mexico.
- Recent news on the Autism front includes reports of a new study that is following families expecting new babies, who have a child with Autism, and assessing them from top to bottom, including the minutiae of their home environments, and even attending the births of the new children. They hope to isolate any causal factors in the hunt for the roots of this disorder that has risen so strongly in the last decade. Additionally, scientists are finding that kids with Autism respond differently to sound, which may explain some of the relational challenges they struggle with, and be a possible early indicator to enable earlier interventions which have proven very effective.
- The urgency to address childhood obesity is warranted, but strategies that include mandatory school testing for a child's BMI which has been proposed in Oklahoma are highly controversial. The proponents of the program feel that is gives awareness and support to families with children at risk, which in so much as it could help them address the root causes such as environmental pollutants, which scientists are finding have a link to the obesity epidemic, could be valuable if applied properly.
- Speaking of caution about what one puts in the body, "the FDA has issued a warning that the mercury contained in silver dental fillings may pose neurological risks to children and pregnant women." They advise specific guidelines for these at risk groups when having any dental work done.
- Could some breast cancers regress on their own? Does increased mammography actually pose a risk? Interesting issue to read about and consider.
- And finally, technology for the germaphobe geek. Building on Google's recent announced partnership with the FDA to track flu outbreaks around the country based on keyword search concentrations, now your phone could alert you if a the people around you, i.e. all those other media device users, seem to indicate that they are sick. They think of everything don't they?
Check out the permanent link in the side bar with a link to Dr. Sears' website advising how to survive cold and flu season with your kids.
Photo courtesy of wikipedia.org
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Friday, December 5, 2008
Our Moon Shot is Far From A Clean Shot: Relevant Energy and Environmental Concerns
President-elect Obama is moving swiftly to name his team, and the order of his nominations and appointments could be seen as an agenda priority list. First, the economy, then national security, and next up is energy and environment, with several prominent names from science and politics in the mix. Just as with the other issues pressing on the soon to be installed new President, the challenges are huge, complicated, and have far reaching implications for immediate conditions and future aspirations. And although he indicates that he wants the White House to "go green," the scope of the issue will require a comprehensive, forward reaching, energy policy as yet unattained in previous administrations.Although the price of gasoline has plummeted in recent months, Americans are still smarting from energy prices that tipped many households into financial ruin, so timing and urgency are of the essence. Of all the soundbites coming out of the presidential conventions, it was the assertion at the Republican National Convention that energy independence must be this generation's "moonshot," which might well be something that everyone in the spheres of politics, business and society can easily agree on.
Make no mistake about it, this rare agreement stems from chilling evidence that we are perilously close to the conditions that existed during "the great dying," otherwise known as the end-Permian extinction, which occurred 251 million years ago. It was "the worst of earth’s five mass extinctions. Ninety percent of all marine life and 70 percent of terrestrial life disappeared. It took five million years, perhaps more, for the biosphere to recover." Conditions, an environmental "horsemen of the apocalypse" scenario, are accumulating at an alarming rate, and fears of an unknown tipping point make the necessity of bold action clear.
However, agreement on strategies to both avert a calamitous environmental event, as well as achieve the mission critical mandate of energy independence, are far from consensus. Ethanol based biofuels, once the environmental darling, are quickly losing their appeal as countries around the world flirted closer to food shortages of catastrophic proportions, although the large money interests behind them keep them far from the periphery of potential solutions.
European nations, notably Sweden, continue to work out the challenges of biogas, in which sewage is captured and transformed into fuel, but convenience complaints and a setback when Volvo (division of Ford) ceased production of a biogas vehicle have hampered progress. Several nations are also actively pursuing ways to safely and effectively capture methane gas hydrates, which are "flammable ice crystals packed with hydrocarbons." The sheer amount of this lesser known resource, and significant advances on ways to bring it to market are making it something akin to a goldrush, perilous and potentially packed with profit. But there are significant concerns about the risks, such as the effect of the release of the trapped solar heat from millions of years ago contained in these packed parcels that could very well exacerbate, and perhaps accelerate our environmental problems.
And then there are the reliable stand-bys that we have been willing to get off the ground for decades, such as solar. Affordability has been a key detractor, but recent advances, combined with increased compatible governmental policies and subsidies are making this option more and more feasible, and some say that “In five to seven years, the idea of building a home without solar energy on it will be as silly as building without plumbing.”
Although early deployment results have been mixed at best, hopes for the electric vehicle are resurgent, especially with the battery advances that prototypes such as the Chevy Volt offer, if they can avoid insolvency to be able to bring it to market, as well as a innovations and business models from a host of other non-traditional start-up entrants into the fray. Hawaii is boldly plugging into the electric model, and an entrepreneur, backed by convincing endorsements, who stands poised to build a comprehensive electric network to support the technology. Aided by an equally as bold and ambitious venture to harness ocean wave power, activity in this sector of energy provides some interesting alternatives to fossil fuel based energy options.
Already the specter of innovation to generate new "clean tech" jobs and break the geo-political strangle hold of oil is invigorating to a global economy watching the collapse of old business models and the growing and potentially destructive leverage of oil rich regions of the world. But as in all the pressing policy agenda items before our nation, execution is key, and it remains to be seen if the new administration can find the right balance of present dividends and future sustainability necessary to seize upon yet another historic component of this moment in time. You know, no pressure.
Photo courtesy of CA department of fish and game
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Wednesday, December 3, 2008
In this Hot Mess, Which Burner is Education On?: Relevant Social Agenda

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Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Once a Bully, Always a Bully?: Relevant Parenting Fears
What are your list of "I won'ts" when it comes to parenting? As in "I won't raise a brat," "I won't raise a bully," "I won't raise a (insert your reviled political party here)." Most of us start off with the best of intentions, but what happens when things don't go the way we planned? What if your child is the bratty one that others secretly hope won't rsvp "yes" to playgroup, and how does it feel as a parent when you realize that your child is the bully that others fear and revile?Most assume that such children result from fundamentally lacking homes, thus the comforting litany of parental resolutions that we think will shield us and avert such calamitous results. But, as a mother from the U.K. recently shared, worrisome behavior can crop up in the best of families. Realizing that society will all too willingly label and pigeonhole her child in a ill defined box, she writes, "there's definitely an element of the bully being a child who's been labelled and who doesn't know how, and isn't being helped to shift out of that "naughty child" position, and so who simply goes on living it, digging himself deeper into the hole."
Taking the behavior seriously is essential. The victims of bullying behavior are left with sometimes lifetime repercussions, and in some tragic cases take their own lives, as was the case with the recent highly publicised online bullying case. But parents also have to be on their kids side in a world that will easily label and discard them.
So scratch out that "I Won't" list and instead start an "I Will" list:
- I will acknowledge who my child is
- I will accept them as they are, and love them where they are
- I will be their biggest advocate
- I will hold them accountable
- I will not hold their youthful indiscretions, terrible relationship choices, and misguided political affiliations against them, and I WILL feel free to comment on them vociferously.
Photo courtesy of healthwatchcenter.blogspot.com
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Monday, December 1, 2008
Teens Twitter, Are in Your Facebook, and Scream They Just Want MySpace: Relevant Teens

It's Teen Time!
- You may despair of your teen spending too much time "connected" to social media, and bemoan the fact that they have mastered blind texting under the dinner table when you've prohibited such things. But while you think they are just wasting time, a study about teenager's Internet usage finds that the benefits outweigh the perceived risks. Put that in your Facebook and Tweet it.
- Seem like teens have become "unclear on the concept" of the purpose of community service? You would be right, and some schools are altering the rules of the game to bring altruism back into the equation and promote community partnership.
- You made sure they ate their vegetables, got their check-ups, so why drop the "guarding their health" ball when they move into their autonomous teen years? Marketers work hard to snare the kids' attention early on to capitalize on the lucrative teen years. But as the toxic loads in many mainstream personal care products becomes known, some worry that parents are easing up on guiding their kid's choices which affects their health precisely when they are most vulnerable to products that put them at risk.
- Times are tough, and the gift giving budgets are thin. Teenagers aren't immune either. Check out these innovative low cost gifts that teens can give those pesky adults in their lives.
Photo courtesy of FutureParadigm.org
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